Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
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i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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