Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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