Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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