you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Randomize
