Little spoons don't ask big questions
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
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