When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
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