Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
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