he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize