Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
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