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so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
