if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
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