that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
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