one might say we're banned from that church
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
