Do vagina's smell?
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
