i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Randomize
