friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
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