i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Randomize
