week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Randomize
