Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
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I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
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TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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