im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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