Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
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