I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
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