i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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