nut hugger
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
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