Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??