Your dad touched me again.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
