I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
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Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
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I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!