ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
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