i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
