I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Randomize
