i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
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