did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
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