I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
