I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
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