in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize
