im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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