stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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