hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
