She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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