I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Naked Twister starts at high noon
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
Randomize
