Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I think my moral compass just broke
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
