are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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