dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Randomize
