Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
