I'm going to jail i love you
Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Randomize