But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
