babies were throwing up all over the place
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Randomize