it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
