garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize