what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Randomize
