you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
