drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Randomize
