would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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